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Social Media - The Good, the Bad, the Ugly?

5/18/2017

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Three Steps to Sanity   
                                                                                                                                                             
How to get rid of PC in our upside down world…where wrong is right and right is wrong!

Social Media – The Good, the Bad and the Ugly! 

​For a new website, I am pretty pleased with the amount of traffic that travels through; however, I am perplexed and surprised how few people leave their mark in the way of comments while visiting! I was so excited to have a controversial article section to openly discuss different topics.  I thought it would be really fun to have a “safe place” (since I would be the referee) for the expression of opinions. And I mean your real, honest non-PC opinion! 
​When was the last time you really felt like you could say exactly how you feel without retaliation?  I have come to the conclusion that many people really are afraid of continually getting verbally beat up! Too many people choose to be offended! It’s a real shame and it is unnecessary – it’s a mindset!
 Am I right?
What do you think?
Do any of these things below fit how you feel? 

​1. I don’t want to get negative feedback.

2. I don’t want to be politically incorrect.
​
3. I don't want people to think my comment is stupid!

​4. I can’t express myself well.

5. I don’t really care.
​
6. None of these apply to me.   
 

 
So, let’s take a look at the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly (PC wise).

THE GOOD

 Social media allows the opportunity to easily find and keep in touch with friends from the past, present and even make some new friends. PC wise, however, it seems sometimes there is a false sense of niceties to the point that one may really wonder if a remark is honest. It appears to me that sometimes people get on line simply to get sympathy, pats on the back, positive kudos, when a healthy self-esteem would not need to go in that direction.

THE BAD

Twitter appears to be the social media that people really lash out at each other and often they use a fake name. If people truly believe what they are saying then they should be willing to use their real names. If you are ashamed to use your real name then maybe you should take another look at what you are posting. Again, everyone has a right to express how they feel about anything without being attacked. We need to value others opinions. As I always say, we all come from different circumstances and we can never know what another person is going through because of what they have experienced in their life.

THE UGLY

The Bad and The Ugly kind of go hand in hand. To me the Ugly has to do with attacks, name calling, cussing and especially the vile kind of degradation that goes on! I question the people who appear to enjoy being ugly. Are they trying to lift themselves up by tearing others down? I believe that people have more problems than rudeness when they fit into this category. 

 
Second – It is not possible to be offended by anyone and I will tell you why!

Yes, you read that right. It really is not possible and the reason is very simple!  When the recipient of the supposed offense chooses not to take offense then the person did not offend, whether they wanted to or not!  How exciting is that?
Taking offense is the recipients’ choice and that gives them all the power!  Do you realize how different our world could be if people just understood that one simple choice to make.
​
(If there is nothing else in this article that you hang on to, I hope it will be this thought.) 

When a balloon is being inflated and gets tighter and tighter, people who are watching might be a little nervous as they are anticipating the explosion. If an observer were to walk up to that person and ask for the balloon and let all of its air out, obviously it would not explode. The tension in the room would be gone. That person deflated the situation and the same thing can happen when the recipient simply refuses to be offended.  It can instantly deflate the situation before it pops!  (There will always be those people who are waiting and anxious to pop it!)

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Think of it this way...
                        Next time you are tempted to take  offense, just say to yourself…

​

I refuse to give you the                                                                              power to offend me!
​

ASK YOURSELF THESE QUESTIONS...

Just think about how different things would be in your life if everyone you talked to acknowledged your thoughts and comments as your thoughts and comments. And wouldn’t it be great if you did the same for others, by accepting their right to their own opinion?

If you knew that others would not take offence by anything you said…

…would you engage more?

…would you express your true feelings more often?
​

…would you enjoy conversing with others more?

If people reacted this way, how do you think it might affect your family?  And what if that way of thinking spread to

…our communities
…our states?

…and even our countries?

Do you think it could make a difference?

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Third – Are you tired of constant attacks on Race, Culture, Religion…etc.?                                                                                Well, it’s not really about those things! Find out why!

NOTE: I am going to write about BAD BEHAVIOR that occurs in individuals.  This is NOT about race, religion or any other specific group, even though there may be certainly activities that certain races engage in, more than others. Bad behavior occur in every race. This article is about BAD BEHAVIOR  that we as parents needs to be aware of and more than anything to make the point that we CHOOSE whether to be offended or not.  

I remember as a very young child, being afraid of people who rode motorcycles. Why? Because it was a common thing to see the Hells Angel’s on the nightly news.  In my young mind, if those motorcycle riders were on television wreaking mayhem, then all motorcycle riders must be doing the same thing. I was especially afraid if there was a large group of them, as I saw on television.

I never noticed their race; however, what I did notice was their very scary behavior. They terrified me as I watched them terrify others when they bullied their way throughout the country! Today, that image is completely opposite in my mind for several reasons. First, I am old enough to know better than to label a whole group of people because of a few radicals.  Second, many of those groups riding motorcycles have long gray hair now, still wearing leather jackets and chains; however, their behavior is very different. They tend to be known for doing good things.  I’ve seen them leading the funeral processions of service men and women, as well as riding for other good causes. Now I feel no fear at all for this group of people.   

It seems to me that every generation has older people shaking their heads at the crazy behaviors of the youth. I grew up with a very conservative mindset and at the tail end of the hippy days.  I remember being a youth that was horrified (and embarrassed) by the behavior of the hippies at Woodstock, with the “free love” and “anything goes” mentality!

Way back in history outlaws used handkerchiefs to conceal their identity. The bandanas and scarves of many different colors have been used for years to represent different gangs and still do. Well, a lot of people wear scarves and I am not afraid of scarves! I am fearful of the BEHAVIOR of certain people who wear scarves to hide their identity and others who identify themselves with scarves and their (too often) BAD BEHAVIOR!

For example, several years ago, there were groups of teenagers playing the “knock out game". At the beginning, these groups were predominately black teenagers, however, eventually there were many different races of teenagers who ran up to older people hitting them in the temple and then turning the opposite direction and running. Some people actually died from this horrific BEHAVIOR!

I was afraid of the motorcycle gangs who were mostly white men. I’m white, but I was fearful of the BEHAVIOR of these people wreaking havoc by destroying property, threatening, stealing and being violent. They could have been blue for all I cared, the behavior is what caused me to be afraid.

The list is even longer today. Today, we have Black Lives Matter with many different races represented. We have watched them turn over cars and light them on fire, break into stores and steal, beat up anyone in their way and all in the name of racism. The BAD BEHAVIOR  scares me no matter the race of the person. 

Now we have ISIS which is comprised of many different races and religious groups. We are called bigots if we decide to cross the street hoping there is not a bomb under their clothing. We have a right to make the choice to protect ourselves and our family by crossing the street, even if it looks bad to those who choose to be offended.

One of the most confusing situations today is the gender identification.  Since the beginning of time we have had two genders and now the last count I have heard was 91! That  is very confusing! Apparently there are continual differences about how someone feels for a particular day. I am okay with others “feeling” however they want to feel that day.  I am asking for tolerance for me because I might be a little confused myself considering how many different sexual identities that apparently exist. 

We cannot say that it is the problem of everyone of any group! This all comes down to one thing! BEHAVIOR! It is the behavior of the individual or group that needs to be discussed. I have a right to be left alone to believe how I choose. People can do whatever they like as long as I am not forced to say I agree with their BEHAVIOR choices.  

My choice is to treat everyone as a human being. I still have a right to feel sad for the people that make choices that make their lives difficult! I feel bad for those who make bad choices because they may not have had direction and guidance from loving people in their lives.

It is not the race, the religion or the gender of anyone that is the problem! It is bad behavior of the individual or the group of individuals. THAT is the problem! 

As always - to get to the root of the problem – we have to look backwards

​All of these articles end up talking about choice and consequences, because they really do matter. It can benefit your life and the lives of your family member when they learn to focus on the consequences of their behaviors. We can help our children avoid explosions in their lives by teaching them how to learn the consequences before they make their choices. 

We can choose to be a part of the Good, the Bad or the Ugly part of social media. Help your family understand the consequences of social media.    Jane E. 

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    So, do you think our world is upside down and inside out?  it's time to get back to some sanity where right is right and wrong is wrong! 

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