Dads - If you start feeling like your presence in your home does not matter,                                keep this list handy and take a look at it often! 

Fathers in the home improve their                                                                                   family’s lives in these areas: 

1. There are 76.4% of US children live in a home with a father and mother.

2. Decreases the chance of poverty.

3. Improve infant mortality rate within the first 28 days.

4. Adolescent girls are less likely to experience pregnancy.

5. Decreases suicidal ideation and behavior.

6. Improves behavior in infants younger than a year.

7. Largely decreases likelihood of young men carrying guns and dealing drugs.

8. Higher educational attainment and success.

9. Better attitude about schooling and higher education.

10. Better cognitive, developmental and sociological behavior child outcome.

11. Much lower statistics for incarcerated fathers.

12. Lower WIC and Head Start recipients as well as lower public assistance and Section 8 housing.

NOTE: I chose to show the positive statistics because the actual study below shows the opposite and it is quite dire!
​
You can see the study by going to:
https://fatherhoodfactor.com/us-fatherless-statistics/

​​Since this is a newsletter honoring fathers, I’m going to go down memory lane a bit. In today’s terms many would say I had a dead-beat dad because he wasn’t around much.

In reality I had a dad who owned his own business in the 50’s and it was a “Happy Days” type 50’s restaurant. It ended up a hangout for teens, a dairy in the back and burgers, soda/ice cream parlor in the front. He opened at 11:00 a.m. and closed at 11:00 p.m. If I wanted to see him, I had to go down to the “plant”. That was not uncommon in those days for men to work very long hours.
​
Some might ask if I had any dad issues because I saw so little of him. The answer is, “Absolutely NOT!” In fact, I have very loving memories of my “daddy”. 

 I hope you feel valuable, because you are!!!

It is difficult writing articles when I know that many do not have the best scenarios in their homes. I don’t want you to feel helpless!
 
Many things happen in lives that are simply beyond our control OR we may have made some bad choices due to our adolescent brain OR other’s choices may have created difficult situations beyond our control.  Anything can happen to any of us simply because it is life! 
 
No matter how you get there, being a strong NOT a wimpy parent kicks in and we do the best we can just because we love our family! 

My daddy and me in 1956

My memories of him are:
​
1. He engaged with me when I was around him, meaning he talked to me and that was important to me!
2. He complimented me; he praised me, encouraged me in all of my “adventures or projects” and engaged with me.
3. He willingly helped me and just philosophized about different topics with me. He made me feel important and I valued the time I was able to spend with him.   

What if Father’s Day brings you pain…for example…

What if...    
​
1.  What if you didn’t have a father figure or a good father in your life…


​2. What if you had a bad father in your life…



3. What if you haven’t been a great father or feel you have even been a bad father to your children…
​


​4. Think about if there are situations that bring you pain…
Some thoughts…

​Could you...

1. BE all of those things you dreamed about and wanted for a father to your children or even another child who didn’t have a father. 

2. Try to understand why he wasn’t a good father from his perspective and then forgive him. Forgiveness can help take away pain.

3.  Use some self-reflection? Would it be valuable to identify how you learned to father. Did you have a good role model? If not, can you find the kind of father you would like to be like and model him.
​
4. Understand there are some feelings that may need to be addressed so you can know how to better handle a similar situation for your children.  It can bring you peace to know you are not passing on hurtful behaviors. 

If you have some pain from your father, are you able to live and learn from the experience and be a better father yourself because of it?

FORGIVENESS is such an important trait to have and the saying on the left is one of my favorite sayings because it is so true.

When we go through life hating or being angry with people, we are truly the ones who are hurt or damaged the most.
​
Forgiveness is extremely important for peace, I hope you will seek for peace! 
​

Some great videos for your enjoyment!
Father Friendly: Cheerios rated Best Dad Commercial
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_HoPdhTUFjc

This Father’s Day, Go Ask Dad      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmWRODY0ing

2015 Toyota Camry – To Be a Dad Official - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mI9nW8k1xZA

To bring this back, I just want to say that every child wants their dad to be their super hero! I truly believe that is born into them. Of course, there will always be cases when the ideal situation is not possible. It is my hope that you will be able to find a way to be the father you want to be!​

Your children may not always remember what you do or say, however, they will always remember the way you made      them feel!

Below is a great reminder of how important dads are...

When God created fathers, he started with a tall frame. Observing that, a female angel nearby asked, “What kind of father is that?” If you are going to make children so close to the ground, she continued, “Why have you put fathers up so high?                            

A few questions to ask yourself…
 
1. What emotional benefits can a child gain from having a father figure?
2. What impact does a father have on a child’s academic abilities?
3. Does having a father figure impact a child’s social behaviors?
4. Are children without father figures more likely to experience depression or anxiety?
5. What can a father figure provide that a mother cannot?  
6. How does an involved father figure positively impact a father-son bond?
7. How does an involved father figure positively impact a father-daughter relationship?  
 
Read the answers to these questions at: http://www.happeningsmagazinepa.com/2014/06/18/benefits-present-father-figure/
​

​Fathers – You are valuable and your children need you in their lives, especially now as our world is crazy, where wrong is right and right is wrong! Look for a future article about the “dumbing down of men” that unfortunately has occurred and shamefully continues to occur!      Fathers - We appreciate and need you!                                   
Please forward this to other men who you believe might enjoy this article!  
                   
 Thanks again!  Jane E.

This looks like a great recipe! I just sounded like something men would love...  

​http://allrecipes.com/recipe/238654/brookies-brownie-cookies/

​ God simply smiled and said, “If I make him child-like, who would children have to look up to?” The angel shook her head and said, “God do you know what you are doing? Large hands are clumsy. They can’t manage diaper pins, small buttons, rubber bands on pony tails, or even splinters caused by baseball bats.”                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 Again, God smiled and said, “I know! But are they large enough to hold everything a small child empties from his or her pockets at the end of a day, and yet small enough to cup a little face?”                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Then God molded long, slim legs and broad shoulders. And the angel nearby almost had a heart attack! “Boy! This is the end of the week alright,” she chuckled. “Do you realize that you just made a father without a lap?"                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       God smiled and said, “A mother needs a lap. A father needs strong shoulders to pull a sled, balance a child on a bicycle, or hold a sleepy head on the way home from the circus.”                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       God was in the middle of creating two of the largest feet anyone had ever seen, when the angel, who could contain herself no longer said, “That’s not fair! Do you honestly think those big boats are going to dig out of bed early in the morning when the baby cries or walk through a small birthday party without crushing at least three of the guests?                                                                                                                                                                                                                               God smiled again and said, “They will work! You see, they will support a small child who wants to ride a horse to Banvury Cross, or scare off mice at the summer cabin, or display shoes that will be a challenge to fill.”                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       Then God worked throughout the night, giving the father few words, but a firm, authoritative voice, and eyes that saw everything but remained calm and tolerant. And finally, almost as an afterthought, he added tears. And then he turned to the angel and said, “Now are you satisfied that he can love as much as any mother?”                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      And the angel shutteth up!
                                                                   Erma Bombeck                           Thanks again for reading!  Jane E.